Four Weeks

It's not that I didn't believe the time would go fast or that an itty bitty baby would grow and change a little bit every single day. But living that is a whole different story than being told that. Four weeks ago I had a baby. Can you believe that? I still can't. I've been trying to write down my "birth story" all day today and still am not done with it--and that's really something considering I barely remember much once we got to the hospital. ;-) Behr will have it all written in his baby book (something he'll probably never care to see but I will treasure) so I don't think I'll post it all here. The big highlights are below...

• My water broke around 4:45pm outside of Giant while I was waiting for Dre to pull the car up. It had been a week since I'd had any sort of consistent contractions when my water broke--and I still didn't have any for five hours.
• While waiting on contractions we went to Home Depot for our Christmas tree. We did laps there with my sister until the store was closing hoping for contractions but nothing. We came home and Dre and the Christmas Angel (Caleb) put lights on the tree.
• 540 lights and an hour and a half later I was definitely in labor and having contractions hard enough to need Dre's help tracking them and applying counter pressure to my hips.
• We left for the hospital a little before 1:45am. I was admitted and checked in at only 3 centimeters--which definitely disappointed me since I was 1 cm at my last appointment. The contractions had been so close together and so consistent for almost 3 hours that I was sure I'd have made more progress than that by the time we got to the hospital. The midwife went to go lay down and Dre and Jan tried to encourage me that I hadn't come to the hospital for nothing and that no matter what there was going to be a baby soon.
• Time is pretty much a blur from then on. I labored and Dre applied counter pressure to my hips. Jan encouraged me, encouraged Dre, got ice for me and coffee for Dre, and kept our families wonderfully updated. I really can't imagine at all going through all of that without both of them being there to support and help me. It proved more comforting than I could have anticipated to have my two best friends by my side.
• Just before 3am things the midwife checked my progress and I was 7 centimeters. Whew! Progress. The news was encouraging because the contractions hadn't felt significantly more intense than the ones at home (though they were painful) but they were exhausting and I was about ready to be done. The news was also rather intimidating because hearing I was at 7 cm and feeling my body changing a bit meant I was nearing the all consuming "transition" stage and I wasn't sure I could bear more. But there wasn't much of an option. ;-) Thanks to water therapy (ie. "the tub"), Dre almost breaking his back trying to apply counter pressure to both my hips for every contraction, Jan encouraging us and helping communicate with the nurses and midwife where we were at and keeping Dre awake and encouraged, time continued to march on. Eventually Jan and Dre were pretty sure I was getting to the other side of transition and I was starting to tell them I thought I wanted to push (or had to--I don't think I really 'wanted' to at all).
• At about 7:30am the midwife checked me one last time, I was at 10 centimeters and ready to push. I then decided I couldn't push and pretty much wanted to no longer be conscious anymore. I was exhausted. I was afraid of contractions because I couldn't relax and couldn't function anymore with their intensity. The only option really was to push and so I did. Five pushes later I heard my dear husband crying (I knew he'd cry ;-)) and little Behr was here.

  Kristen made this video for me (?) of the night Behr was born; I've been rather "unemotional" since Behr was born--go figure--but this gets me pretty close to tears every time. I am so grateful to have her as a part of our "family" and home and her help with Behr to give my arms a break when he's fussy or help share the Behr snuggles. I can't wait to tell him someday how she waited all night for him to be born in the waiting room with Caylub passed out cold on Jan's pillow (another story). My mom used to tell me who was in the waiting room waiting for me and those are relationships that are still meaningful to my family and I love that and pray ours with K.Snyd is the same.

Having hip labor was nothing that I had expected. From the first contraction to the last one it increasingly felt like my body was going to split apart from the pain or my hips were going to pop out. Somehow I had no idea that hip labor existed. It really threw me to have nothing I had anticipated being comfortable or pain relieving to do much. The only thing that "helped" was Dre applying counter pressure. Behr is worth every moment of pain during labor and every bit of discomfort during pregnancy but whew! The memorable quotes for Kristen and my mom after delivery was me telling them that Behr was going to be an only child. Still not totally convinced our family will have more children but we'll see. ;-)

I still am at a loss for words for how to describe how much having a baby and watching my husband with that baby has made me fall in love with him more and more. I have never been as cared for and helped as much as I have by Dre in the last almost twelve months. While he (as predicted) sleeps through Behr's wakings in the night if I need him he's quick to get up and help me with whatever Behr or I need. I love that Behr responds to his snores and his voice more than almost any other sound around. I love how little Behr looks like in his dada's arms and can't wait to watch their relationship grow. -- Dre was amazing while I was in labor. If for no other reason taking birthing classes was well worth it for how it prepared him to anticipate and understand what was happening and how to help or just wait on things. He was patient, attentive, and "present" the entire time. He made the perfect "coach." :-) He was up all night with me and yet helped with the baby and never complained of his less than comfortable sleeping arrangement while we were a the hospital.

And so, in a somewhat abbreviated form, that is how we became a family of three on December 6th. Our lives were changed forever with little Behr's arrival. Maybe someday he'll have a sibling. We'll see. ;-)

Behr Malachi Kless

I feel like I've been writing this post in my head for months; I wrote seventy-five percent of this post before we even went to the hospital. Yet not really writing entire thoughts because nothing was final and we really didn't know what our little boy's name would be until a crazy moment while I was in labor at the hospital. (Why wouldn't I want to name my child while in transition??) And now he's here. Our son. He has a birthdate that will be imprinted on my heart for the rest of my life and he has a name. One was thought about and written down and rewritten  and guessed at and second guessed at for months. [Though truth is we didn't even start talking about names together until after we found out that he was a little boy because prior to that any conversation about names was a conflict.]

December 6, 2011 -- pc Aunt Titi/I'm Kristen Photography

Behr. I'm not a "Little Woman" girl--but that doesn't mean I'm not a Louisa May Alcott girl. I love the books "Little Men" and "Jo's Boys." And I do love the very end of "Little Women." My favorite character is Professor Bhaer. I love the character of the man Alcott created, I love his challenging Jo to not write cheap pieces but use her gifts more and trust things to work out and I love the way their romance plays out as mature friendship turned love versus the youthful excitement of Laurie's love (no offense; can't knock any character Christian Bale has ever played ;-)). For me that's where I picked our firstborn son's name; I've had it in my head for years but I think surprised everyone when it was announced in our hospital room. The spelling of Alcott's character was too "bulky" feeling for me (though I can appreciate it's "German-ness") so it looks like he was named after Behr paint but I promise it's not that. His character is summarized by Alcott (via Jo of course) below. I hope our son grows up in many ways to be like Professor Bhaer.

“. . . Jo wanted to clap her hands and thank him. She did neither; but she remembered this scene, and gave the Professor her heartiest respect, for she knew it cost him an effort to speak out then and there, because his conscience would not let him be silent. She began to see that character is a better possession than money, rank, intellect, or beauty; and to feel that if greatness is what a wise man has defined it to be, –’truth, reverence and good-will,'–then her friend Friedrich Bhaer was not only good, but great.”

Malachi. We have been waiting for this baby a long time. For many couples who wait for God to give them children the story of Samuel and 1 Samuel 1:27 are the things that captures that for them. But for me, because I'm a little odd at times, the verse that captures it is Malachi 3:10-12. A close friend shared that verse with me years ago and it has been a constant reminder and encouragement as we have waited on many things but especially (at least in my heart) a baby. For whatever reason I really feel that I knew this child was a son and from the time I knew I was pregnant wanted 'Malachi' to somehow be a part of his name as a way of reminding myself and of continually being grateful for this precious little life we've been given.

"And thereby put me to the test, says the LORD of hosts, if I will not open the windows of heaven for you and pour down for you a blessing until there is no more need. I will rebuke the devourer for you, so that it will not destroy the fruits of your soil, and your vine in the field shall not fail to bear, says the LORD of hosts. Then all nations will call you blessed, for you will be a land of delight, says the LORD of hosts."

Kless. The last name for our son is very important to us as well. It's not necessarily something you typically see dissected when parents announce the name of their child but we wanted to mention it. We both love our families a great deal and are grateful for the little ways growing up in a part of them made each of us who we are. Dre's dad married his mom way back in 1985 and from then on was Dre's father in every way. Dre never felt unwanted or second best in his dad's life. Before we were married it was very important to Dre to change his last name to his dad's last name/family name legally so that when our family started it would be as a family of Kless. And we're thrilled to add a Kless son to the family--and couldn't love him more!

I'm so grateful that Dre liked these names and whether my reasoning was the same as his or not thought they suited our firstborn enough to agree that his name would be Behr Malachi while I was spazzing out about it in transition. Memory making as parents started an hour before we saw his sweet face.

Our Nursery

Putting together this little room is one of the things that has made me realize, in becoming a mom myself, how much our parents anticipated us and worked to prepare for us even in the little things. Our little boy will never know that I made his curtains or the lengths that were gone to get his changing table, that I lost my mind and went crazy taping and prepping for the stripes one random night, or how hard his daddy worked to paint and patch the walls in his room, and even if he did know all these things he wouldn't really understand. It hasn't been about creating a perfect room it's just been about all the anticipation and excitement in welcoming this boy into our family.

That said I love the way his room turned out. So...without further ado...our nursery!

view from the door. can't wait 'til there's a little boy waiting to be picked up in that crib. 

sweet crib from his grandpa and grandma price--crib skirt via me with some fun Michael Miller fabric--green rug found with help from Janners on a super clearance at Crate & Barrel. 

blankets made with love waiting for snuggles.

the ever growing menagerie waiting to meet their friend.
I love the connection each animal has to someone looking forward to him. 

aunt titi updated and crafted up some leftover decorations from my baby shower into a mobile. super skillz!

Ikea bookshelf made into a changing table.
& the slowly assembled wall art including a "Wookie the Chew" print
and of course a Nats pennant and a plaid.

// How did it get so late so soon? Its night before its afternoon
December is here before its June. My goodness how the time has flewn. // Dr. Seuss
a quote I read over the summer and loved for the connection to anticipating this little guy. though I have no problem if he decides he wants a November birthday instead of December. ;-)

blanket from one of Andree's aunts, painted lines with help from aunt titi, repurposed lamp crafted up this summer and books!

every little boy needs to be well versed in the story of Robin Hood.
an airplane model made for him by daddy -- a special donkey from Oklahoma where our hearts ached for this child.

one of my favorite things in the room: Tarzan books handed down from my great uncle bob and grandpa's childhood. 

don't miss the Zim ;-) 

the dresser I had as a kiddie and lots of little clothes waiting to be worn.

Happy sigh. It's just the very best and sweetest room in the house. On different days you can find any of us up there reading or working on our laptops in the quiet of his room--plus it gets the best cell phone reception in the house. It's been a fun project as a "family" (and in that I include dear K.Snyd/Aunt Titi). It's not perfect but it's for our son and he'll quickly learn that his daddy and I aren't perfect either but we love him very much and can't wait to do our best to raise him. 

A Little Room

When we did one of many visits to Winding Creek I took this picture. I knew the first time we saw this house that, if this was our house, it would be our baby's room. We weren't pregnant yet, there were plenty of uncertainties in my mind, and there were plenty of other houses we looked at and plenty of short sales that we knew of from friends that didn't go through. But then we did a walk through in the spring, months before the sale was final, I started to hope that this might be our boy's room. And today I finished the last project in his room (other than cleaning) and it's officially "ready" for a little occupant. A little baby boy that sometime in the next month we'll bring home from the hospital and learn all about taking care of and fall in love with. A little boy who right now I can barely imagine what his face and his fingers and toes look like yet in a few days or weeks I'll see them for the first time and know for the rest of my life exactly what he looks like even as he grows and changes.

So yeah. Assuming this little man doesn't come tonight (no reason to think that don't worry ;-)) the next post will be pictures of his room which really is the best room in the house in the opinion of all this house's occupants.

Closer & Closer

The landmarks that have been staring at me on our calendar are getting crossed off...

PC Kristen

- Baby Shower. Jan and Kristen with help from Bunny and generous friends threw me an overwhelming baby shower. I mean really. Overwhelming. It was beautiful, the food was delicious, the presents were ridiculous, and the amount of love and excitement surrounding us was just unbelievable. I'm so grateful I'm still speechless three weeks later.

- Hospital Tour. We "toured" Shady Grove Hospital's maternity center today after church. It was boring (as expected) but at the same time exciting and surreal. Lord-willing the next time we're on that floor and at the hospital it will be to have our little man and then to bring him home with us.
- Classes. Our last birthing class is tomorrow afternoon which I guess means we're officially certified as ready to have a baby or something. It has been very helpful though and I can't recommend our instructor enough. We're both going to miss our weekly visits at her house. I'm grateful for the way Dre has jumped into learning about the birth process and what to (hopefully) expect.

- Nursery. It's almost, almost done. Just a few more things to tweak and then I'll do a special "reveal" post on here. I love it; it's come together just the way I wanted/pictured it. Every member of our little home finds themselves wandering in there to sit and look at tiny clothes and tiny socks. It's just the best room in the house.

- Belly. And then there's this guy growing and growing and kicking and kicking away. I just can't wait to see his face. Any time now... and goodness. Who knew my belly could expand this much!

Bigger & Bigger

Little Monkey is getting bigger and bigger! I was looking at pics from the last few months and found the addition he's added to my front pretty amazing. It's incredible that I get this sweet privilege of growing a little human. :-)

• Baby's favorite (or is it possible least favorite? I go with the former) music seems to be Mumford and Sons. It's the oddest yet cutest thing. If I'm listening to Pandora he starts kicking when Mumford comes on and lately his daddy puts Mumford and Sons on in the car or the house all the time just to see him moving around.
• His kicks are sure getting stronger! And his favorite trick is to find a nook and ball himself up (or something like that). The other day it looked like I had half of a softball sticking out of my side just below my ribs from the way he had positioned himself. Such a little nut.
• I love how he already interacts with Dre. He certainly knows his voice and often will start buzzing about when Dre enters the room. Dre's face when LittleBoy kicks back at his pokes or rolls around under his hand is one of the sweetest memories I'll always have of this time in our lives.
• I not only weigh more than I ever have in my life I am certainly eating wayyyyy more than I ever have before. It's ridiculous but praise the Lord food tastes good these days.
• The nursery is about 70% done and I love it. I walk in and look at it every morning before I go downstairs. Thanks to my dear hubby and Kristen for their help in accomplishing my crazy schemes with painting and helping my crazy pregnant self chill out when I felt like everything needed to get done one particular Thursday. (Hormones are nuts.)
• We'll be 32 weeks tomorrow and only 8 weeks away (give or take on either side) from meeting this little guy. I can't wait to see what he looks like and hold him for real. I keep commenting that this little boy is not only a welcome first born for our family but just such a wonderfully anticipated and prayed for babe. I am so grateful for the gift he's already been to me and his daddy. 

And it begins...

Sorry for the bad cell phone pics but we have officially started on the Little Monkey's nursery!

Paint!

Super Husband/Daddy painting late at night. Even more grateful considering how much he hates painting. ;-)

I'm excited, neurotic (you don't want to know where my OCD has taken me), and a little nervous about how it will all come together but no matter what I'm overwhelmingly grateful and still, seven months later, in awe that this is for our child. What a sweet, sweet gift!

More Baby Crafts

Crafting for my sweet boy is apparently my new hobby. And I think that "nesting urge" has hit and hit hard this weekend! I'm not quite sure I understand how one week away from my third trimester I'm only just now getting any energy back (maybe so much got sucked out during the sick of the first trimester that it took longer to come back than 'the books' said it would) but that combined with "nesting" is putting me in project mode hardcore. And with a husband who works weekends I'm not complaining.

This is how I spent my Sunday night...

Before: A simple but dark (and brown which doesn't match anything we have anymore) Ikea lamp shade. And Ikea stand. 

During: I bought a cheap small off-white shade at Target. (Literally the last one on the shelf at the second store I visited. College students like small lamp shades?) Combined with a fat quarter I had purchased off Etsy of Alexander Henry animal print fabric. (Gotta find some use for the mountain of fabric I've accumulated!) 

After: A sweet little lamp for a soft light next to the chair in Little Guy's room. Keeps the green/blue colors going but takes a break from what is becoming an awful lot of stripes and polka dots. It's not totally perfect but I love it! I can't wait to point out the rhinos and giraffes and anteaters on it to my babe. (Same Ikea stand; the brown lamp is in storage now.)

There are many tutorials and suggestions on doing this. I referenced "Darling Octopus" for my guide. 

For My Little Guy

I'm having lots of fun (and plenty of surreal moments mixed in) preparing for our little boy to come. One thing I've been waiting forever to do it feels like is make blankets for our baby. I have plenty of other nursery projects waiting but I started with blankets because I felt like I could actually then make something and see the progress quickly. So voila! Dreams coming true in the cheesiest, simplest, craftiest way. ;-)

I made a tummy time/snuggle blanket out of green minky circle fabric and pears. This tutorial gave me a simple guide and was easy to follow.
And then a smaller car seat blanket out of a remnant of blue soft fabric I've had stashed away and some airplanes. This tutorial is pretty similar and really basic.

Now all I need is a little boy to snuggle up in them.

Little Boy Update (25 w. 6 d.)

Our little boy sure seems to be growing and getting stronger and somehow even busier in there!

He seems to either love or be afraid of thunderstorms. The ones we've had in the last month are a guarantee to wake him up and get him to start thumping around. I love thunder and lightening and big storms and Dre is pretty afraid of them so the odds of whether Baby is reacting in fear or joy are about 50/50. ;-) He woke up after the earthquake too though I'm not sure if that was because he could feel me pacing about afterwards or if he felt anything himself.

Dre finally felt him kick a few weeks ago. He said it felt like "a heart beat" inside my stomach which really is a pretty good description of what some of these movements feel like. Baby still seems to hide from Daddy but he's felt him a few more times since. 

If I could eat one thing every day these days it would be blueberry pancakes. Blueberry muffins and pancakes have been a re-occuring theme in my cravings with this pregnancy. It's not that I don't like those things "normally" but man. They are just the best flavors these days! 

He responds to the sound of music, especially if it has drums, to the sound of Daddy's voice especially if he's been gone at work all day and his voice is a "new" sound in the day, and to Little Meep, when she's around he goes wild; here's to hoping that means they'll be buddies some day.

I've amassed a stash of fabric to make some blankets and little pants and "baby things" as soon as I find the time + energy to do so. I'm optimistic I'll at least get something made for him even if it's not everything I dream of (and that's ok). 

His room isn't at all close to ready but there's an ever growing pile of clothes and treats waiting in it for him. We're so blessed by every reminder of other's excitement with us for this little guy. 

Little Son

When we first found out I was pregnant I 'knew' it was a boy. I don't know how I knew or what that even means but there was just a feeling in my gut and my heart that this little babe was our son. The one we've been waiting for and the one we can't wait to hold. As soon as the sonogram tech turned on the machine she too knew that it was a boy. Let's just say little man is already a daddy's boy and not shy. ;-) I wouldn't have been shocked or disappointed if he was a she instead; I don't even know if I could have felt happier just to see that little one jumping all over the screen healthy as can be. (And he was practically jumping; both the doctor and the tech commented that he was not one of the "most cooperative babies [they've] ever scanned." :-P)

It's amazing to me the feeling of 'knowing' our child in the tiniest of ways before he's in our arms. Whether it's his gender or how he seems to come alive at the sound of the shower or way he already responds to his daddy's voice, I love the bits of knowing and relationship that are already developing for our little family. What really stuns me is the verse that has echoed in my heart since the day I told Dre we were gonna have a little of our own this winter. "Before I formed you in the womb I knew you" says God in Jeremiah 1:5. And He doesn't just mean He knows our gender or our birthdate but He knows us. No aspect of our lives, the timing of circumstances or situations in our lives surprises Him or catches Him off guard. No response in our hearts or in our foolish or commendable behavior come as a surprise to Him. There are many things I already pray for this little man but more than what I pray or the plans I have for his nursery or the dreams I have of watching him with his daddy, the excitement I have of knowing that God already knows him and his future and has a good and prefect plan for his life brings so much peace and hope as I look ahead to our little son. I'm so glad Dre and I get to be a big part of it!

Halfway There

On Sunday we hit the halfway point of this little babe's residence inside my growing belly and him finally being in our arms. I've never been someone who enjoyed the heat of summer too much and fall is my favorite season but this year I just can't wait until December. I've never looked forward to it more.

• Son. Little babe is a boy! I really felt like I 'knew' that this one was going to be a boy (unnervingly revealed to the dear husband when I pulled out the small stash of clearance baby clothes I've already amassed and Dre realized they were all for a boy being born this winter) though I would not have been disappointed in any way, shape, or form if he has been a she. But he is most definitely a he and a very proud one at that. ;-)
• Nicknames. Considering how many nicknames Dre and I have for each other and our friends not to mention the legacy of Miss Meeper I'm somewhat 'surprised' that our little baby doesn't have a nickname that's really stuck thus far. "Bacon," the KG's term of endearment for our some day child hasn't really caught on with the father-to-be who would prefer his prodigy not be named after a food. I think I most often call him "Bug" but I'm not sure it's reached nickname status yet. Audrey for whatever reason associates the baby with a duck, particularly when she sees any sonogram picture (3-D or otherwise). So there's always "Ducky" but considering that refers to Audrey's large plastic duck from Cape May and the baby I'm not sure that's gonna stick. Mostly baby is just "Baby" and that's alright with us because we're just so grateful there is a baby. :-)
• Weight. I finally started gaining a few weeks ago and am thankfully on track. For whatever reason gaining weight was a fear of mine but no problems there so far. I officially weigh more than I ever have in my life and I am quite proud of that. 
• Cravings. I think I've had more aversions than cravings and for whatever reason Baby doesn't prefer some of my most favorite foods. (Namely, potatoes and french fries.) If I do want something I'll want it desperately for about three days and then be sick of it. Foods that have gone that route so far: bean burritos, PB&honey, pretzels, birch beer, green onion bagels from Panera, and many others. Most of the time if you offer me a shaved ice or snow cone I won't say no, especially if it's cherry flavored. After not being able to eat ground beef for the first trimester and start of the second I'm back to eating it and the first week I could stomach it probably ate five burgers in seven days, all with pickles of course. 

Other than that, the daily adventure of being pregnant, life continues. Hopefully this blog will get a bit more attention in the weeks to come. We've certainly got plenty of adventures ahead to keep it going!

I Get By

In the infamous words of my husband, here's the thing... I am thrilled to be pregnant. I am so grateful. I am so excited. I am so overwhelmed by the fact. But good-ness! It is all consuming in a way nothing, particularly no "sickness" I've had (and I'm a pro at being sick), has ever been. We're just getting our toes into the second trimester and I'm certainly feeling "better" than I did even a few weeks ago but sheesh! I have never been sick like the last few months and could not imagine this kind of sick. Don't worry I'm not going to go into details, just laying out some background. ;-)

Being sick, attempting to continue working full-time, being a wife, and just staying alive has seemed like more than I could handle on many days. And I just wanted to list, because I don't want to forget, the many kindnesses I've been shown in only these first months.

First of all, I know there were many prayers for us to have a little babe from so many different friends in so many different parts of our lives. And I am grateful to have been aware and unaware of how many people were carrying this on their hearts for us.
Then there's my best-friend-who-might-as-well-be-my-sister. When I was first hit with being super sick I came home from care group one night and found a nearly spotless apartment. She cleaned, folded things, put away things, took out the trash, annnnd threw out all the food that had been long forgotten by me in my fridge. And that's just the 'big' thing she did for me. She's made me corn bread when it was the only thing that sounded good, she's picked up random food for me while out on errands, bought me pedialyte when I needed the hydration help, and been kind and gentle when I've "made memories" while we're out doing errands. ;-)
Add the many other friends who have brought me baked potatoes or tortilla soup when they weren't coming over for anything else. The friends who have encouraged me and told me this wouldn't last forever--and if it did that I'd make it. There's the texts from my mom (and in-laws) that always remind me how sweet this little life is. My dad picking me up from a party so I could crash on their couch and Dre could stay and enjoy time with friends. The sweet excitement so many of our friends share with us every time they see us. Oh and my little bestie who thinks the baby is a duck.
I am so grateful for you all. I am blessed with more friends than I can name (and most of you who don't have links for me to show you off :-P).

And I can't forget my dear, patient, forbearing, understanding husband. He has been amazing. I mean, I'm not saying I didn't think he'd be helpful and kind and patient but he's far surpassed any expectation I had for being the husband of a crazy pregnant lady. He's gone to more random places to get me food at random times than I can remember, rubbed my back and hugged me when I felt miserable, patiently put up with me when I "made memories" when we were out and about, reminded me to take my vitamins, prayed for me when I was discouraged, and told the baby to be nice to me.

These Happy Golden Years

Five years ago today we promised to love one another for the rest of our lives with the rest of our lives. The road God has led us on since that day hasn't been exactly what we'd anticipated but by it we've grown more and more in trusting His hand and becoming even closer friends than we were the day we were married. If an outsider were to look at our life you would probably see the dramatic changes in some of our circumstances in the last few months and have little idea how much God has done in providing bountifully exactly what we needed when we needed (financially, spiritually, relationally), in providing by taking away or not giving us what we desired, and in faithfully drawing our hearts to Him over anything else. Through our marriage and through the way God has led both Dre and I, I have come to know God more and trust Him more completely and there is no greater gift I could hope for in our marriage than that that continues. The song "Sometimes A Light Surprises" has been on repeat on my playlist for months now and I can't summarize any better the way God has been there for us the last five years than that.

My love, I love you far more deeply and far more completely than I ever knew I could love someone five years ago. You have carried my faith when it was weak, cried with me and for me, patiently served me in big ways and small ways, sought to bless me and make me smile every day, and been my best friend in the tenderest ways. I love the man you are: the hard-worker, the joker, the sports fan, and the loyal friend. I love the way you wholeheartedly pursue the things that you love whether it be learning your job as an ATC, DC sports teams, your friends, or whatever random item catches your interest that you spend hours learning about via books and the internet. I can't wait for the next fifty years by your side.

To our friends and family, we can't imagine life these five years without your influence, fellowship, laughter, and support. Whether you were co-workers, care group members, friends from high school, or people God randomly put in our lives we are grateful for you and the fact that our marriage is full to the brim of dear friends who love both of us.

And now we're off! To spend our traditional weekend in DC to celebrate. This year we're bringing 'with' us someone extra, name unknown, and estimated date of arrival into our arms in early December... Meet our Sweet Baby K!  

What a five years!!